Category Archives: NHL

The Suffering Sports Cities List


In the wee morning hours of 3 November 2016, the Chicago Cubs did it.  After a century plus of lovably losing, the most rabidly “happy to be hear” fanbase in all of baseball finally got to fly the last W of a baseball season.  Facebook posts of grandparents crying, fans roaming Addison in mindless glee, and young Cubs fans entering a world where “Billy Goat, Bartman, black cats” mean absolutely nothing.  The long Northside Nightmare was over.  But for every broken curse, another lives on.  Sports is a dichotomous exercise and for every W there is an L.  Sadly, the fans of the Cleveland Indians experienced something last night that they’ve become accustomed too over multiple generations: the despair of sports suffering.

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Since Grantland… (Week of 25 January 2016)

Every week, we’ll pull some highlights from the ESPN media world on articles, stories, ideas, arguments, concepts, schticks, and discussions that appeared on the World Wide Leader since the demise of Grantland and its unneeded contribution to the world of sports.  Pretty much, this is what the brain trusts at ESPN thought was more worthy of coverage than whatever the brains over at Grantland were producing…


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Half-Asian Guy’s Super Bowl XLVIII Bet Slip

Russell Wilson

A word to the wise (and while we’re at it, the un-wise), please feel free to take every single opposite bet here and actually make money.  Remember, back in August I was happily sitting on an Atlanta Falcons SB victory prediction.  Oh how the fallen have fallen…

Legally Mandated Warning Statement: The 500 Section does not condone the illicit abuse of gambling privileges that Americans may or may not actually have.  Please Bet Responsibly.

(NOTE: All picks were made with 5 units of a currency to be determined)


Seattle Seahawks to win – Moneyline +110

  • I would like to take this moment to congratulate the Denver Broncos on their Super Bowl victory and to Peyton Manning for his double dirty bird gesture at the trophy podium.


Marshawn Lynch (SEA) OVER 90.5 Rushing Yards (-135)

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Filed under Gambling, NFL, NHL, Politics

If Sports Were Girlfriend Relationships…

NFL Logo

The steady, long-term, daytime girlfriend.  

Very pretty, but not flashy and over the top (both in and out of bed).  We spend the most time hanging out after work and during the day on weekends.  Take road trips just to see in person for a few hours and super comfortable with doing the introduction to all my friends since they really like her too.  And that might be a problem since everyone also gawks at Miss Popular.  However, there’s nothing of a high reward at the end of the day (aka the Buffalo Bills in the SB and every fantasy season).  Although things are steady, except for the occasional disagreement over something trivial that got out of hand (aka forgetting an important relationship date/the referee lockout), they are not surprising and sometimes guys gotta mix it up a bit.

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Mik’s Picks: The Sports Commercial Bible

Commercialization has been both a blessing and curse for sports, but mainly a blessing.  From shoes to drinks to jerseys to shit to hang on your wall, buying stuff to remind of us our endearing obsessions with sports is what American capitalism is all about.  Don Draper, you would be proud (since I’m assuming you’re gonna be dead from lung cancer by Season 11 of Mad Men/the early 90s).  Watching hours upon hours of ESPN and live sporting events as a kid and especially during the high school years meant immense exposure to sports related commercials; if these things were radioactive, I’d be glowing bluer than that dude from The Watchmen.  Therefore, the following videos are going to lean heavy on stuff from the past 15 years, but hey before MJ who cares about sports commercials anyways.  Anyways, if you want to kill your working hours, feel free to spend it perusing the following list.  To the YouTube-ing!

Disclaimer – The 500 Section acknowledges that the following content has been created by third parties and in no way makes any claim to the proprietary rights of this content.  Please contact our legal representative, Hart Wood, Esq. for further inquiries.

Note – These are in no particular order.



SportsCenter, otherwise known as the required viewing for every male in America (and yes, if Obama wanted to put an individual mandate on that, the Tea Party better not stand in his way), has been a treasure trove of commercial content for decades.  Here is a snapshot of my personal favorites:

  • SportsCenter – Usain Bolt

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Filed under MLB, NBA, NCAA, NFL, NHL, Pop Culture, Soccer