The Bass: Hip Hop Power Rankings for January 2014


Ni**as like you all is what I call wannabe’s
it ain’t shit compared to real motherfuckin’ G’s

– Eric Lynn Wright aka “Eazy E”

The world of hip hop is like the NBA, WWE, GOP 2012 Presidential Primary, the OJ Simpson Chase/Trial, Fast and Furious Fill in a Number, and the AVN Awards all bacon wrapped in one mix tape.  In other words, Long Live Warren G.

We here at The 500 would like to convey our deepest admiration and bestow the first ever hip hop power rankings, here forth entitled “The Bass”.  Our carefully selected winners of the current urban zeitgeist were carefully scrutinized for their lyrical, beat mix, panache, ridiculousness, 40 yard dash, and swag-y-ness abilities.

Special shout out to the 500 Section Music Committee, Sub-Committee on Bass co-chairs Mr. C-Marsh and the Mayor of H(ip Hop) Street, Mr. Scotty-Z.

On to your January 2014 Real Muthaphukkin G’s:

10. French Montana

Your 2013 LeBron James anthem

9. J-Cole

Your Section 8 version of Drake

8. A$AP Rocky

“He opened before Beyonce.  He was very scary!”

Quote from “The Biter”

7. Meek Mill

Fun Fact: In May 2013, Mill was found to have violated his probation and was ordered to take etiquette classes.

6.  Eminem

Throwback Special

Bryce Harper was 7 years old when this track came out

Half Time Entertainment Presents

5. Kanye West


4. Wale

DC’s Finest

3. Macklemore

Seattle’s Finest (and whitest)

2. Pusha T

Has feuded with both Consequence AND Lil Wayne well before his debut album last October.

1. Kendrick Lamar

The undisputed King of Hip Hop (#ReturnOfWestCoastRap #LA)

Whether it’s in features

…or #1 hits

…or just straight legit tracks

Honorable Mention – 2 Chainz

Quote: “The flow is contagious and deadly like Rabies, had your girl in the suite swallowing babies.

Dishonorable Mention – Drake

In 2018, Drake and Pharrell will be charged with homicide for the murder of rap music

Best Underrated Bass of 2013 – Travi$ Scott

Official “The Bass Committee” Rankings

The Half Asian

10. Big Sean
9. J-Cole
8. Kid Cudi
7. Macklemore
6. Pusha T
5. Wale
4. French Montana
3. Meek Mill
2. ASAP Rocky
1. Kendrick Lamar


10. J-Cole
9. French Montana
8. Eminem
7.  Wiz Khalifa
6.  Pusha T
5. Drake
4. ASAP Rocky
3. Meek Mill
2. Macklemore
1. Kendrick Lamar

Mayor of H Street

Feds Watching:
10. Death Grips
9. Eminem
8. Macklemore
7. Kanye West
6. El-P and Killer Mike (Run the Jewels project)
5. 2 Chainz
4. Slaughterhouse
3. Pusha T
2. Kendrick Lamar
1. Wale

Conference USA/Western Athletic Conference (play in time):
10. Death Grips
9. Cannibal Ox
8. Atmosphere
7. Metro Zu
6. Shabazz Palaces
5. Deltron 3030
4. Chance the Rapper
3. Joey bada$$
2. Action Bronson
1. Odd Future

Oz Behind the Curtain Division:
10. Mike Will Made It
9. Dr. Dre
8. Drumma Boy
7. Timbaland
6. Mike Zombie
5. No I.D.
4. DJ Mustard
3. Pharell
2. Nez and Rio
1. Boi-1da

Unavoidable and Unrankable for various different reasons:
3. Pitbull
2. Drake
1. Migos


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